against all my advice mats wants to be in the boxing fight. there s nthg i can do to talk him out of this madness. he s fighting against this huge man n he wont even take off his glasses. ah ah. it s nervwrecking. how can he not see what s coming next. we sit there n watch. it s the most horrible 3 minutes i can recall. mats gets a punch in the middle of his face. i think i m his coach so i must rush n see what the fuck s happening. there s blood all over his face n his specs r broken n he s got huge splinters in his eyes. but he tells me. he tells me he s really happy. for now he has become a tim burton figure at last.

i m lost in these fields. it s yellow as far as i can see. nothing but wheat. n really tall. the sun is burning my skin. dont know if i m feeling good or bad.i m heading somewhere but i dont know where. just keep going in order to get to see anythg but yellow fields. n the sky. i am barefoot n my feet r sore. n then i see someone sitting among the grass n the wheat. i can see his back. n his blond head. i touch mats' shoulder n when he turns out he is really sad. in fact he is so sad that his eyes have fallen out. n he cant see no more. i dont know what to say to him about it. i really dont know.

in my childhood room i give mats my bed n climb up to emma's bed. then during the night the bed collapses on top of him n he s crushed n dies.


  1. oh my god.
    such a weird dream this one.
    poor mats :D

  2. poor him! indeed! it was 3 different ones. lol. but i put them together in one post cos it s been a while n the detail wasnt that powerful anymore.

  3. oh no it was 3 seperate dreams. my comment got lost. strange. lol.

  4. you have such a beautiful photos in your blog, and these texts are cool :---)